Happy weekend! Don’t cheat!

Q: What’s the secret to a long and happy relationship?
A: Cheating!
Oh wait no, wrong answer. It’s honesty, trust, respect, and communication. And if you’re a girl, ALWAYS laugh at his jokes, but avoid making one yourself. Guys don’t want girls to be funnier than they are.

Since this blog is meant for educational purposes only, here’s a lesson: don’t cheat. It’s wrong. If you cheat, God kills 50 kittens, and then molests them. I know, not even remotely acceptable, but he works in mysterious ways.

It’s still totally acceptable to listen to songs about cheating. Most of them fall under the whiny and oddly empowering “you cheated/I’ll never take you back/I’m stronger without you” category, but some are a joy to listen to. Here’s a few examples, all appropriate for weekend jamming.

Teengirl Fantasy – ”Cheaters” (John Talabot’s Classic Vocal Refix) (2011)

While the original Teengirl Fantasy track is quite gripping in its own right, the John Talabot rework takes it into a more housey, and highly addictive direction.

John Newman – “Cheating” (M.in remix) (2013)

Again, absolutely nothing wrong with this dandy original by the 23-year-old John Newman, but remixes are just so much fun! This particular one was a popular summer jam this year, if we are to believe one commercial radio station in Germany. And why wouldn’t we. It’s easier than forming your own opinion.

Oliver Cheatham – “Get Down Saturday Night” (1983)

Ok fine, this one isn’t about cheating, but that’s what you get for having a last name like Cheatham. It’s confusing! I tried to interpret the lyrics, and I’m quite positive I got it right:
– If you’re climbing in a tree, Oliver instructs you to get down, because it’s Saturday night. There’s no tree climbing on Saturdays after 6 pm. Everybody knows that.
– He likes to potty, everybody does.
– He likes to have himself some fun fun fun fun. Presumably, Rebecca Black’s “Friday” was an homage to Oliver Cheatham.

Happy weekend! Be good.

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2 kommenttia kirjoitukseen Happy weekend! Don’t cheat!

  1. June June kommentoi:

    I know you said cheating is wrong. But we could still cheat on our spouses, right? Like, with each other? And then, sort of, get married and stuff? Will you marry me? PRETTY PLEASE??!

    1. Maria Maria kommentoi:

      I’m sorry I’m playing hard to get, BUT YES, YES I WILL!

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